Jon Gosselin is a Tool

If Black and Decker ever decides to do a name-change, or some entrepreneur decides to enter into the business of tools they should consider the name "Jon Gosselin". Anyone who sees a circular-saw with the initials JG on the handle, and who has been alive for the past 6 months, will know they are purchasing one of the highest grade tools ever known to man. JG will symbolize toolness on a previously unknown level, and the buyer can rest-easy at night knowing that their tool will last longer than anyone thought imaginable, because that's what Jon has done.

Fifteen-minutes is up (it was up 5 years ago). In fairness, I have to confess (and I think most people would agree with me on this one), I felt sorry for Jon during the last few episodes of Jon and Kate Plus 8; sitting on the couch next to Kate (I actually believe they had Satan playing the role of Kate for the last 2 episodes of the show---you'll have to check the final credits to be sure). But now, the truth has been revealed to us---Kate may have been a cold-hearted prune, but your love would shrivel up to if it was Jon who was supposed to keep you moist.

Yet, they all continue to make the news: Jon...and Kate...and...wasn't there someone else, oh yeah, "the plus eight" children, all of whom we can now assume will develop into healthy and happy teenagers and young adults. Do I smell an E! "Where Are They Now?" 2020 version? (of course this assumes the world is not going to end in 2012 as they Mayan and Nostradamus predicted---yes, that's right, the culture that Western Europe destroyed with a parade and Paul Moody have foretold the end of the world in Dec 2012, which means there should be some fantastic Christmas sales that year, the "liquidation of the world sale")

I simply want to know at what point society will say no to Jon and Kate, begin to pray for the "plus eight" and move on! The Duggars have tried hard to fill the void left by J&K, I think they are planning on popping out number 19 early next year. But, I guess America likes its families pathetically dysfunctional, and the Duggars may be just a little too normal and happy to be prime time material.

Oh well. I guess if Larry King is still talking with Jon then he must be news worthy, right? Let me answer that question with another question: who went on Larry's show and informed him and the world that she likes to spend her time naked (oh, and something about the world of modeling be racist)? Yes, Tyra and Jon have somehow made it on Larry's show in the past couple of weeks, and we still don't have health care reform. Way to get to the issues at the heart of every American Larry.

Jon go away. Media, when Jon goes away, do not follow him. Let him go to whatever nightclub, brothel, or bunny ranch he wishes to attend, and allow him to carve himself a new niche in society. One that does not involve me having to see his face on TV ever again. And, if ever there was an individual capable of carving themselves a new niche in society, it is Jon. After-all, he is such an amazing tool.